By Isaac Chandler
August 2, 2019
Anheuser-Busch recently filed a trademark with the US Patent Office to have Budweiser proclaimed as the “Official Beer of Esports,” and many around the gaming community came away rolling on the ground with laughter.
Many of the company’s beers have been mocked over the years for their watered-down taste and fans across the community took the trademark viral with comments about other more preferred beers to represent the scene.
But here at EsportsTalk, the trademark filing led us to a more profound question: was their any credibility behind the trademark and claim by the company?
To find out, several of our staff, Jake Luksan, Chris Majot, and Xan Vital all agreed to partake in our own beer-based challenge: to try 20 of Anheuser-Busch’s beers from across their vast libation empire and determine which, if any of them, are worthy of being the “Official Beer of Esports.”
Before we get started, let’s introduce how we’re going about deciding which is the best beer.
We’ve divided the beers into four different categories and sorted the beers into each: Budweisers, Internationals, Domestics, and Craft Beers.
In each category we have:
We’ll put each beer in each group through their paces before selecting the best from each one to move on to the final. There, the beers will be tried once again and the highest rated one given the title as our “Beer of Esports.”
With that all said, let’s dive on in.
Starting off the competition, we had our “testers” try out the category Anheuser-Busch was trying to trademark: Budweiser.
Starting off with the categories namesake, the trio found Budweiser to be just alright, with Jake pointing out how “basic” it made him feel, almost like being in college.
Next, we had the team try out the lighter version of Budweiser, Bud Light. Both Chris and Jake found the Bud Light, famed for its near water-like taste, the be better tasting than the original.
For beer three we had the team try out Bud Light Platinum, the “high end” version of Bud Light. The team liked the bottle the most of all the ones in the category, though while Jake thought it tasted a lot like Bud Light but a bit smoother, Chris wasn’t as big a fan of it.
On to beer four, our team jumped to Bud Light Lime. The guys were mostly not fans of the drink, with Jake almost gagging on it, claiming it tastes like a tequila shot.
The final beer in the group was Discovery Reserve, with the boys thinking it had an odd, almost old hoppy taste about it.
After trying all five out, the winner with two out of three votes for it was Bud Light, with a single vote from Xan going over to Bud Light Lime.
This definitely claims a spot as the category the guys were least excited to try due to the lacking taste of US beers, Domestics was our second group of beers for the competition.
The trio started out trying Naddy Daddy, a 40 oz can beer you’d see in a game of Edward 40-Hands. The guys were not fans of it in the slightest, absolutely disgusted by it’s lacking taste.
Next up we had an old school favorite in Michelob Lager, the old-school Michelob. Starting to get a bit tipsy, the guys thought it tasted pretty good and had a pretty esport-sounding name to it, but it lost a few points for Jake being from the home of his ex-cornfield girlfriend, Missouri.
Our third beer in the category was, correctly this time, Michelob Ultra Amber, the most well known Michelob. Chris and Xan barely took a sip before putting it down, with both agreeing it tasted rather poor. Jake seemed alright with it but wouldn’t give it his top vote.
Beer four was one of my favorite domestics, Shock Top. Jake didn’t trust that it was a Belgian white beer yet still a domestic, throwing Xan for a geographic loop nine beers in. The guys thought it was okay, though not as good as its biggest competitor in the US market, Blue Moon. While I didn’t get to participate in the tests, I’d agree with the statement from my past drinking experience.
The last beer in the Domestic category was a little bit sneaky on our end: Busch non-alcoholic. The guys never noticed it wasn’t a real beer, and Jake had nothing but praise for the beer, though did note it’s still just a domestic.
The winner for the group was Michelob Lager with two out of three votes again, with Jake dissenting for the non-alcoholic Busch.
Starting off the classy Internationals category, the boys took a hand at Stella Artois, a Belgian pilsner. They all were pretty grossed out by it, with Jake stating it tasted like “a skunk.”
Up next we had Franziskaner, a German Weissbier. Mispronunciation and spills aside, Jake and Chris weren’t that big of fans of it (Jake actually hated it), Xan thought the beer was nice with a light root beer taste to it.
Beer three in the Internationals category was the German dark beer classic Spaten Optimator. A little tipsy thirteen beers in, everyone was incredibly disappointed with the Spaten, with Jake saying it tasted “like how [he] imagine[s] cigarettes taste like.”
On top beer four, we had a nice Japanese beer enter the fray with the famous Kirin Ichiban. The guys loved the beer almost as much as Jake was loving the mic-boon, with the trio agreeing it tasted like “magic in a bottle.”
The final one in the group was the British Boddingtons, a pub ale from the UK. The guys weren’t big fans of the beer, with both Xan and Jake agreeing it tasted like a flat Heineken. Chris thought it tasted like watermelons (there are no watermelons in the beer).
The winner by unanimous vote was Kirin Ichiban, by far the groups favorite beer in the category.
Our last group of beers, the boys started the category out trying Four Peaks’ Kilt Lifter Ale. The risque name aside, the beer made Chris visibly cringe from its strong taste, likely from the fact that it had nearly seven times the alcohol level of most of the other beers they’d tried.
Beer two was the Goose Island Matilda, a fruity Belgian style ale. Starting to slur their words a bit, the boys agreed it had a very earthy taste to it, but seemed to enjoy it.
Beer three was the Elysian Space Dust IPA, a beer brand founded and popularized in the Seattle area, home of the IPAs. Jake and Xan thought the beer had a horrible aftertaste, but Chris like it, saying it tasted like “the skin of a grapefruit.”
Speaking of grapefruit, the guys tried Four Peaks’ Grapefruit Radler for beer number four. After Xan showed the other two how to properly do a cheer, the trio took a good swig of the beer and found it absolutely delicious, though a little too sweet.
The final beer of the group stage was the Breckenridge Nitro Vanilla Porter, the second beer of the day in a 40 oz can. The guys said it had a nice vanilla-chocolate taste to it with a hint of coffee, and agreed it was an absolutely fantastic beer. We did have a bit of a scare, however, as Xan did mention he was allergic to chocolate (thankfully there was none in the beer).
The three couldn’t decide on which beer was the best in the group, which Jake taking the Vanilla Nitro, Xan going for the Kilt Lifter, and Chris taking the Grapefruit Radler. After ranking the beers individually for their top three in the group, Chris came down as the deciding vote, choosing Kilt Lifter to move on to the final.
The final saw each of the guys sort the top four beers from best to worst and give it a rank from 1-10, with 10 being the highest score. They’d then add the scores together, and declare the highest overall score the winner of the competition.
Starting off with Kilter Lifter, Jake, Xan, and Chris gave it a 6.2, 6.5, and 2 respectively, for a rather low score of 14.7 for it’s final tally.
Next up, the guys gave Kirin Ichiban its second try of the night, rating it, again in the same order, 6.9, 8, and 6.7 for a nice high score of 21.6, giving it the lead so far.
Beer three saw the guys go for another take of Michelob Lager, going 6.9, 6, and 6.9 for an solid score of 19.8. The small domestic fanbase could be heard cheering outside the studio.
Lastly, the boys gave their opinion on the king of water, Bud Light, scoring it 7.6, 4, and 8.4, for a grand total of 20 points flat, coming up just a single point short of the Kirin Ichiban.
With that all done, we finally have our winner. The Anheuser-Busch “Official Beer of Esports” award goes to the Japanese Kirin Ichiban!
Congrats to all of our Japanese fans rooting for it, and we hope you enjoyed this segment. To Anheuser-Busch, we’d recommend you guys change which beer you file the trademark with.
That’s all we have for you guys today, thanks for reading/watching and we’ll see you next week with more exciting esports news!